Navigating other people’s personalities...

Navigating other people’s personalities, learning them and managing ourselves in relationship with others is challenging.  Beliefs and values butt up against each other like tectonic plates at times and the aftermath is often as devastating as any ‘natural disaster’ on a mental, emotional and spiritual level - those unseen lands many of us are still so unfamiliar with.  ‘People’ issues suck time, effort and energy from a business if they are dominating agendas.  Personal grievances, staff turnover and general discontent can significantly affect productivity and day-to-day quality of life.

If we all had the skills to navigate relationships well there would be many lawyers freed up to fulfill other needs in the community – imagine…  If it was easy there would be far more of us that were highly competent, adept in the art of people management and leadership.  Far more frequent are reactions, blame and righteousness, indignation and judgements, all with roots in egos.  We can learn relationship navigation skills even as we must learn to accept we are not going to change anyone else’s personality any more than anyone else is going to change ours; that power lies with us, even as how we use it is influenced by others. 

Human relationships are said to be God’s greatest creative expression.  Each one is different, some good, some exceptional, some not so.  In my view we must learn to navigate human affairs, truthfully and openly, ethically and with great care.  We have the power to choose the quality of our human relationships.  We know it starts with our relationship with self, the place that is perhaps most challenging to understand.  We are capable of so much, if only we could accept and embrace another’s imperfections as we embrace the same in ourselves.  Our imperfections can fuel our brilliance – a handy thing to remember.

If you have been noticing relationship ‘stuff’ coming up lately, seek to learn what you can about yourself, your responses and reactions and observe the results your human relations produce.  If they are not want you want - look in the mirror for answers.  Everyone does the best they can - with the resources they have.  If someone doesn’t have resources we think they should have, judging them is not helpful.  Help them develop the resources they need and your world will be a better place.  You can do this by staying conscious that you are ‘telling’ the people around you how to treat you in every moment by the way YOU are.

And that’s it, from my view,

Amanda